He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
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This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
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I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize