Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
