You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
