Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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