What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
