chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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