grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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