I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
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A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
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