I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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