he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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