I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize
