i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
