I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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