you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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