I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Randomize
