Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
