Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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