Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
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