My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
