Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
