Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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