You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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