ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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