I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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