So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
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