Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
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