is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize
