Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
one two three fourrrrnication!
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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