quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
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