Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize