I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Randomize
