thus making me awesome and them whores
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
i need some magic done to my vagina
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
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