Cold hands, warm shart.
Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
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