I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
