her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
