Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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