So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Help. Why am I so naked?
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