you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize
