You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out