her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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