I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
Randomize
