He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
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