i would punch a child for taco bell
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
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