I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Randomize
