I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Randomize
