no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
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