sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
