Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Randomize
