hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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