i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Randomize