if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Randomize
